a▓▓▓▓▓ is ..

sleepy.. tired..

things wil be over soon..

somethin new is coming this way..

______

okay, after realising that actually quite a number of my frens read my blog.. i'll just write somethin today, since easily for the past month i didn't write anything much.

just a little update on what happened to me for the past month.

i started workin at nike, i think almost everyone knows that. and lots of them even dropped by or happened to walk in and i suddenly shout their name. haha!

how's work?

actually.. workin there is damn simple. since i've got the interest in shoes, and i'm willing to learn how to sell stuffs, i really enjoy workin there. i like convincing customers to buy somethin.. and feel glad when they actually do. even tho i don't get any comission, i dont mind since i'm actually learnin somethin and gettin paid during the holidays.

i've also realised that money is/isn't everything, depends on how you look at it.

sometimes i wake up realising that money is everything, and sometimes its the other way round.

but what's most important is fulfilling ur own targets and achieving something, that's what can really make you happy and feel fulfilled and complete.

yes, since i've started workin, i hardly found the time to work out.. and i've been eatin more so end up gainin more weight. my chick wants me to slim down... and even forced me to go on a diet with her.

after workin, i spend less time with my frens, parents and chick. sometimes i miss having the life that i once had, just lepaking and doin nothing, waiting for the next day to come. now i wished that i could balance both.. work few days, rest few days, party few nights..

til now it's pretty hard to trust people.. because honestly i'm not that trustable either. humans are fucking selfish by nature.. and i'm one fuckin selfish asshole and im proud to say that.

but both selfishness and selflessness can bring u down.. and i'm still learning how to have a balance of both.

i miss my niggas, vivi and yh.. hope u two are doin well.. especially yh.. haven't heard from u in a long time.. just chill it aright.. when everything's over, we'll be sittin in the car in some neighborhood sipping our fucking whiskeys and smashing windscreens..

miss my frens as well.. all my college frens drinking kaki and talk cock sing song kaki..

and the girls whom i've been dependin on sometimes when im emotionally broken.. shennie, net, beep, kc, there's all too many of em to list down.. because i'm the kind of person who would blurt out anything to anyone random..

i miss everythin that used to be.. all the high school times, kdu times, brickfield times..

but i noe i gotta move on.. not like everythin's gone.. it has just paused for the moment.. for us to recuperate.. for us to get our asses up and gain something during this holidays.. everyone's been goin their seperate ways.. i've been seeing some of my frens who i used to be close with in my shop.. really nostalgic.. i've even met eu jin and hsien hooi.. miss those st john times.. miss how i used to be an asshole and not giving a fuck, being a useless prefect and breakin all school rules and gettin away with it.. miss how i used to go to school with red hair and being a lalazai.

i really miss being in school. seeing my chick goin thru school life makes me even miss it more.. i've lost out so much during my high school years.. being a fucking loner and never mixing around much.. having people hating me and talkin shit about me.. if only i wasn't that stupid last time. but it's over, ain't no use thinkin bout it.

all these memories will never fade.. it's formed what i have right now. i've learnt from my mistakes and i'm now building a wall that would never crumble.

maybe people said i've changed.. but i don't give a fuck what anyone else says. because i think i'm doing what i think is right.. i ain't listenin to anyone... because my heart tells me not to.

i can be by myself.

i won't lose myself anymore.

right now i've got a wonderful chick and i think things can blossom for us in the future.

where is alvinkei?

he's fucking back.

and he'll never be gone.